FCUK U P4WN3D things that i bout me hmmm

1:)As all who know me ,one thing is constant . I JUS LOVE THE BOOZE.i love alcohol so much that i can build a cult and dwell in it. here is how i fell in love with alc .wen i was 5yrs i went to amusement park got in the merrigo round got out feeling marvelous and wondered if there was some genius concoction to maintain the feeling and 6yrs later walla i started drinking,am(am hopping all that read this blogs don’t have the maths skill otherwise i sound like a disguise to society fabric… wooooiiii) but all in all am a functioning alcoholic.like some people need prayer and love to make meaning to their life. i just need pombe in ma lap.something that takes ma brain places.not something that makes me think about places….lol

2:) Am the laziest functioning man alive.i got my own house wen i was 19yrs jus coz wen i drink for like 5days in a row i dont need someone to tell me to do something for the next 24hrs.examples of my laziness

i:)once i lost my remote to the TV i jus dragged my sofa next to the TV rather than looking for the remote

ii:)when i get out of jobo and get in the house i find it easier just to remove my trouser and leave it @ the door, so that wen am leaving next day for jobo my car keys money wallet and phone is on my way out.

iii:)i once got into a fight with my chick, wen i was in a bar.and i jus had to get a hoe than apologize to her.not that am lazy its much easier .

iv:)i dont text to much work for my fingers period.

v:)in Campo i figured out its easier to kiss the geeks ass 4 1hr a day than to attend my lectures the whole sunlight time,and i got my degree hence the name functioning lazy ass.

3:) i function well @ night am nocturnal in my house has tvlight and computer to light it up..the only thing that has light in ma house is the fridge and my bathroom something about darkness and black jus thrill me.

4:)am not a people person… its jus not in ma DNA. everyone i know i have to meet them thru people i already know and i knew them thru the same process.and most people always mistake me for one of the three.snob,ass or shy. but thats them nothing funny to add to this so moving on smoothly

5:)i hate ignorance E.G racism,tribalism and anything that makes u hate a person for their choice .if u jus bring that up in me its like zero time and space 4 u.am already angry thinking bout it,be it against ethist gay,anything that stupid i jus cant stand people that ignorant

6:)i hate wen guys call women hoez or loose just because they gave a guy some.if u dint pay for sex don’t ever call a chick loose coz i love sex and if a chick has the same sex drive i have,i think she should pursue her happiness and hold her head high as is every other guy.most of my best friends are chicks lesbians and very sexually active and they are the realest people to hang out with.they have gotten me laid mo than the sabina joy cheap drill joint….lol

7:)i have problem with authority jus not good at orders,feel like invasion of my mind.the only authority i listen to is gover jus coz am scared of jail and gettin my ass virginity broken.coz i aint muscle so as long as am in jail i know ill be a bitch so 4 that reason i obey the gover,

8:)i love dumb beautiful gals with a passion ,,,,,, some friends of mine say i love them coz they make me feel smart.some say i love them coz they are easy to lay but… (am jus sayin am not sure but i just think its art from GOD jus the same way u look at art and say wtf all this cash for this and another guys says some shit bout colour and deph thats me with the artistic eye on deciphering god artwork)i really think god is a stand up comic in he’s day time job

9:) i love my sister to death more than my parents and even God .Coz i believe that people or gods that help u wen ur in ur on the edge of extinction deserve my life.other than some imaginary friend,society believe in.or people am supposed to respect due to society dictation (parents),, Am jus one bloody rational .believe in wot u put in and result and get my judgment…

10:)this last one is hard .funny how the net spoils and makes people am the latter met this guy on the NET back in the days L.I.R and he just gave me a new perspective in life and promoted some healthy competition.thru this i graduated had no job ,then he challenged me,and me being the non looser i am,he offered me to buy drinks and this was the same brink ass i knew now he was makin 30G’s after campo and am hustling for 100ksh to buy a K.E=65 and keg 25 to get me mind be running…lol . jus provoked me and did shit right left centre and gues what i earn mo than the motherfucker earn,though am no longer in my beloved country Kenya but am making mo money than the bugger. now our next goal is to retire by 30 as millionaires and MOF coz i know u be reading this get ready to loose ….

NB: this is the most i have felt invaded after that nite at lidos the strippers wekad me on the pole and violated me… dude talk bout getting molested ….lol nice bday though,SKAY of wazanasi can testify to this heheheheh

and this should explian why i dont spell check my blog so if u got shidas fuck u …….LOl

6 Responses to “”

  1. dude “when i get out of jobo and get in the house i find it easier just to remove my trouser and leave it @ the door, so that wen am leaving next day for jobo my car keys money wallet and phone is on my way out.” that right there is pure genius

    @i’ll choose to ignore part of number 10 you put the cart before the horse bitch but that is it well said and true.. heee watu wametoka mbali sana!

  2. @pawned hehehe stepped on ur small toe…lol

  3. nyef nyef retard LOL

  4. Hahahahahaaha boy i can see but i’ll ignore No. 10 for now no hard feelings i believe its the alco in the blud

  5. nice one. i especially like the last one. know where i could meet this guy that igave you perspective? i could use some inspiration…

  6. mustkatia Says:

    Youuuuu Vipp3r! Najua unamiss Keg, sio?

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